CPC exists to offer help and hope.
SELF magazine printed an article entitled “The New Pregnancy Scare” in its December 2004 magazine with a sub-heading, “Clinics run by anti-choice supporters are drawing in more unsuspecting women than ever” about the work of crisis pregnancy centers (CPCs). One of our clients, Mary, saw and read the article and asked if she could respond based on her personal experience here at CPC Gaston County. Here’s the letter she wrote and sent in response to six different editors. She has not received the courtesy of a reply.
Dear SELF,
I’m writing in response to the article you printed about CPCs around the world in your December 2004 edition entitled, “The New Pregnancy Scare.” I must say your story was misleading and unjust. I was 32 years old and already had 3 children, when I found out I was pregnant with my fourth child.
My life wasn’t what it should have been. My boyfriend was on drugs and I was scared that my unborn child would be born with birth defects. I also didn’t want another child! So I looked in the yellow pages for abortion clinics. There, I also found a CPC near my house.
Not paying attention to the fine print located right above the ad, saying: “Does not Provide Abortion Service,” I drove there thinking I’d get an abortion. When I walked in for my appointment, the lady told me, “We don’t give abortions.” She didn’t beat around the bush about it. Feeling embarrassed and confused, I started to walk out when the lady asked if I’d please stay and speak with one of the counselors. I was also given religious pamphlets and information on other alternatives to take home with me! I had so much anger in my heart, and was even angrier when I left the center that morning.
I jumped in my truck and threw the pamphlets on the dash of my truck and started to curse. Who are they to ask me if I want to receive God in my life? I was thinking what has God done for me? And I sure don’t care about their maternity closet. I also didn’t care about a free ultrasound. I didn’t want to see the baby! I just wanted it to be gone. To Hell with those people.
A few days later, I made my appointment for an abortion. I remember sitting in my truck a day or two before my appointment and reading one of the pamphlets that CPC gave to me. In this pamphlet were questions to ask my doctor. What is your name? How long have you been in this field of work? What are my chances of hemorrhaging? Do you have rights at other hospitals? If I have complications after the abortion will you treat me? I thought to myself I wasn’t going to ask him that. I don’t want this baby! I have nothing to give this child.
I had a hard time finding the abortion clinic that morning because there wasn’t any signs identifying the Building. Just numbers! Every woman in there had a 9:30 appointment. The place was dirty. The receptionist asked me how much money I was quoted over the phone. I told her $235.00.
She said, “You do know that it’s $265.00 if you want something for pain or to calm your nerves!” You would think that someone would tell you that you needed extra money for pain. I didn’t have a penny more to my name! I only had $235.00! But I still wanted the abortion! Even if I had to endure the pain!! They took me back and gave me a pile of papers about 1 and ½ inches, I think, and told me to sign them, and said “When you are done, take off your pants and put on this gown.” At this point I’m thinking about that pamphlet from CPC.
I got up and asked the other receptionist if the doctor would fill out the questions in the pamphlet. She looked over my shoulder and then told me, “NO, he wouldn’t sign anything.” I’ve never been to an abortion clinic and really didn’t know how they did things, but one would think that a real doctor wouldn’t have any problems answering a few questions about your health.
Right then, I felt like something wasn’t right about that place. I told the lady I wanted my money back! Instead of giving my money back right away, she made me sit and wait for the other 20 girls to sign in! The whole time I’m sitting there crying like a baby! When she called me back to the front desk she handed me my money and looked me straight in the eye and said, “Now, that was a wasted appointment now, wasn’t it?” What kind of person says that to someone? My whole experience with the abortion clinic was frightening! I felt like I had no one to turn to. I didn’t have anything to offer a baby.
I then returned to CPC. I wanted to see the baby I didn’t kill that morning. I also wanted to know if they were still willing to help me even after I’d been so mean to them. They gave me an ultrasound and showed me my baby! Not just an image of something believed to be a baby, but a real live baby (already 11 weeks old) with arms and legs, a heart beat. My Baby. I also returned a few months later for maternity clothes. I had arrived 30 minutes before they opened. So I sat and talked with a lady about how I had wanted the abortion and all the hate I had in my heart because of this pregnancy.
I later found out that the lady who had invited me to sit with her in her van was also a CPC member. She never made me feel like I was an awful person for hating my unborn child. She was loving and understanding! Soon after I was asked to speak at their annual banquet. I asked what they wanted me to say! They told me: “Just tell your story!” Nothing more. So in March 2005, I spoke at the Banquet. I never expected anything in return.
A few days later CPC contacted me with news of how a church wanted to sponsor my family and I for a year. They wanted to give me a baby shower and help with anything I needed. I must say the baby shower they gave me was amazing! I still have new things that I’ve yet to open! After I gave birth to a baby girl, 6 pounds 12 oz, my truck quit running. So the church who sponsored me gave me a car! They have helped with my bills and Christmas for my kids. This would not be possible if it wasn’t for my mistake of walking into the CPC near my house!
I just have to tell you that I’ve received Jesus as my Savior. Had it not been for all the times I just walked into the CPC looking for someone to talk to and explain the problems in my life at that time, he wouldn’t have known I was crying out and wanted the Lord! He, the Executive Director of the CPC, walked up to me one morning at church and asked if I was ready to be saved? I said, with my life like it is now? He said, “Mary, you are not going to clean it up by yourself!” He walked with me to the altar to be saved that morning! I thank Jesus for the people at CPC because without them I’d be lost!
Before I end this letter, I don’t know much about the government funding you were talking about. But I do know that my CPC gives out more than money could ever buy! The people who work there love and care about every woman and man who walks in there. One CPC member took her shoes off and gave them to a lady who needed them. A lady asks for a coat but CPC had none in stock, so she went out and bought a new coat for that lady. Clothes that can’t be used at the Center because they are too big in size are sent to West Virginia for the needy. They spend their own money to make baskets to fill with things so they can auction them off at their Walk for Life event. All of this just to raise money to support the Center. We have baby bottle blessings that are given out on Mother’s Day and returned on Father’s Day. You fill baby bottles with loose change.
I really just want you and your readers to know that CPCs are here for people who have needs. If they can’t help, they’ll try to find someone who can. You made them sound like people who only care about money, but it is not true. I’ve been down on my luck and needed gas money and walked in there and asked if they would help with a few dollars and they gave it to me. They see your needs and do the best they can to help! Please, next time, before you try to ruin a CPC, look into how they help people. There are a lot of women who have something sitting in their house right now that CPC spent money for just to give it to them. God is doing wonders with those people! May God Bless Them All!!
Mary